Since deciding to focus my next live free webinar event on the topic of confidence and healthy esteem – I’ve been thinking a lot about it. Reflecting on my own journey and those of others, including several women I’ve had the opportunity to coach. What I’ve discovered when considering one woman from the next in terms of personality, lifestyle, and accomplishments are that neither matters when dealing with the issue.
A person regardless of their background, class and experience will have—whether they realize it or not– some very specific characteristics and warning signs if in fact, they do have low self-esteem and confidence.
The point of this post is to call out those signs and put them on blast for the purpose of helping you recognize them in yourself.
Recognizing and acknowledging our own behavior is a powerful first step to finding freedom from the battlefield of self-doubt and those false beliefs about personal inadequacies. It also provides us with the emotional space to heal and develop a sense of wholeness, inner peace, self-acceptance, and appreciation.
Below is a list of some common characteristics exhibited by individuals who have low self-esteem and confidence. I invite you to go through the list and check off the traits that resonate with you most and occur for you frequently.
This exercise is not intended to make you feel bad about yourself, but to help you notice more clearly toxic patterns. I want you to call it as it is! If you have any of these behaviors accept it. Once you accept it, you can do something about it. And, speaking of doing something about it, there is one more step I’ll need you to take.
For every characteristic you recognize in yourself, identify one thing you will do to resist and or prevent that behavior in the next 7 days.
For example, one trait of low self-esteem and confidence is self-neglect. Self-neglect is about sacrificing your well-being including your physical and emotional needs. It’s intentionally letting go by the wayside the behaviors that make you feel good about you, like sleep, exercise, quality time with loved ones and spiritual development.
If you are neglecting yourself you may decide to take action by going for an early morning walk because you love the fresh air and the peace it brings to you. Or you may decide to go to your local nail salon for a manicure and 10 minute back massage to alleviate those knots in your shoulders which will help to improve your posture. 
Ok, it is time to get to it. But first, breathe, show yourself compassion and keep in mind that this is the first step on your journey to becoming whole, confident and a highly esteemed individual.
Ok, Ready set go!
Do you…
- Doubt yourself?
- Feel unsafe and lonely?
- Put negative emphasis on areas of your life that can be improved?
- Disregard and not give yourself the credit and merit rightly deserved for your accomplishments?
- Have trouble accepting compliments?
- Have negative internal dialog?
- Settle for what people are willing to offer you and you rarely express your demands?
- Tend to withdraw socially?
- Beat up and blame yourself for issues in your life?
- Allow other people to define your personal image, and tell you who you are?
- Try to be perfect?
Are you…
- Reluctant to put yourself first?
- Afraid to trust your opinion, ideas, and judgment?
- Overly concerned about what people might think of you?
- Mean to yourself but good and nice to others?
- Afraid to say a decisive no or yes?
- Comparing yourself to others?
Ok, now breathe and show yourself compassion again, and when you are ready make your action list and stick to it.
You can do this! This is a big step to you finding freedom from low self-esteem and confidence.
I’ll be sharing more on this including strategies to help you value your worth during my webinar.
Stay tuned for the webinar details that are coming soon.
Wishing you happy, healthy and abundantly high self-esteem!
Tirza